When we think about what elicits the emotion of happiness, it typically involves some sort of instant gratification, or the receipt of something tangible. But I’ve learned that when it comes to truly loving someone, it should have nothing to do with what we receive because when our lover stops giving, what will be the anchor to keep us in love?
With the hardships and distractions that supporting a home and raising a family can bring, it’s so important for couples to remind each other why they’re in love, why they committed themselves to each other, and why they want to stay together forever. What better way to make the man you love happy than by consistently reminding him why he loves you?
So the title of this post is actually an abbreviation for what this list should really be called:
5 Ways to Remind the Man You Love Why He is Committed to You & Will Love You Forever
1. Never disrespect him (especially in public, but preferably ever).
I know better than most that our men are capable of saying and doing things that can blow our heads through the roof. But regardless of the response we believe their behavior warrants, they are not children. They are adults and deserve to be treated as such. They are our partners, to be communicated with lovingly and respectfully. Dig down deep and show the man you love that you respect him, even when you don’t think he deserves it. Because when it comes down to spending time with someone who makes him feel like a little boy versus someone who makes him feel like a man, which one do you think he’ll choose?
2. Verbalize how much you love and appreciate who he is.
I think our consumer-focused culture encourages us to keep searching for the next best thing instead of appreciating what we already have, and I think the same applies to relationships. It’s easy to create a list of qualities we think our men are missing, and completely overlook the ones they have. So be sure to tell the man you love how much you appreciate the qualities that make him who he is. Don’t just thank him for what he does for you or what he gives you. Compliment his character. Because doing so reminds him that, as is, he is enough.
3. Don’t nag him. Ever.
As women, there are things we feel very passionately about. And when communicating those things to our men, it can drive us insane when we don’t think they’re listening to us. So it only makes sense to just continue to repeat ourselves, particularly in a tone of voice that grabs their attention, until we are convinced that they can hear us!
But let’s be honest. How often do we project our own sense of urgency on certain things and then become irritated when our men don’t embrace it? So I’d suggest first assessing to make sure what you have to say is high priority, then communicate why. If what you want him to do can wait, then let it wait. Second, talk to him when you are certain you have his undivided attention. If he is distracted by something, no matter how insignificant you may think it is, then wait until he is ready to listen. Lastly, always be mindful your tone.
4. Always have his back.
Especially when he is expressing strong emotions about anything he feels is beyond his control. When he is communicating something to you that he feels strongly about, listen attentively and try your best to understand his point of view. Sometimes he doesn’t want to be counseled or fixed. Sometimes he can already see the other side of the coin, but just wants to be heard. Be that ear for him. Be the woman he can count on to have his back no matter what. And most importantly, never downplay, belittle or criticize his feelings, otherwise he’ll never trust you with his heart. If he knows that your priority is to protect his heart, then he will love you forever.
5. Initiate physical intimacy.
To my married Girlfriends who devote so much time and attention to raising your family and taking care of your home, with all of our responsibilities, it can be hard enough to find the energy to connect with our men at all. But every once in a while you have to forget about the dishes, skip the laundry, and turn off Netflix. No strings attached, no hidden agendas, no plans to use it as leverage for something you want. Show him that even with all the different hats you wear in your career, as a wife, and as a mom, you are still a woman.
All of the advice in this post is based on my experiences in my relationship, and advice given from more seasoned friends and family in long-standing, loving, and successful relationships. But I would love to hear from some of my more experienced Girlfriends. What do you do to remind the man you love why he’ll love you forever?